Tuesday night ian stayed over and it was ok we didn’t do much it was one of them lazy nights with the tv on and just chilling out pretty much, but then he went on my computer and started playing minecraft and I didn’t mind at first but then he played it for three hours and it started to annoy me because the main reason he was round was to support me after the funeral but he didn’t show me any attention and then he turned the computer off and then got into bed and turned away from me.
so I was like whatever and just went to sleep, in the morning I was really nice to him and totally forgot how he acted the previous night because even I know you can’t constantly be affectionate and I made breakfast and it was a really nice day in till he was getting ready to go see him ex’s little sister and I got a phone call from Kyle and I answered it and he said he was going to get his hair cut and then he would come around for a cuppa and a fag and just a bit of a catch up, ian didn’t hear anything that was said but he did go skits just at the fact Kyle had rung me and so I said that he is a friend and nothing more.
and then we got into a big argument and he made me delete kyles number off my phone and made me delete my messages from him aswell. and then we carried on arguing and I brought up the girls holiday and said that I don’t like the fact that if it was him he would go. and I said that it’s all about trust and if he didn’t trust me to go on the girls holiday I didn’t want to be with him.
and then I asked him to leave and as he was about to go out the door I shouted down the stairs that I wanted him to delete all the pictures he has of me and also my number and (excuse my langauge) he shouted back up the stairs telling me to fuck off and I got really angry and started screaming at him and we carried on arguing for about half an hour and then I finally got him to leave by saying I didn’t want to argue and I realised that I didn’t feel anything about him leaving with toni the thought of him leaving without an argument being sorted killed me and that’s when I realised I don’t love ian.
im happy being with him for the company and its nice being in a relationship but I don’t love him. but I also don’t love toni anymore I was going through the photos again and I didn’t feel nothing for him.
also I found out that his hulk of a girlfriend dumped him yesterday which made me laugh because he really tried to rub that relationship in my face.