Last night I had some really random dreams… It started with…. I brought a puppy and my mum took it to the vets and got it sent to the place where they kill it and make it into meat xxx and then I had a dream where I was having a affair with this girl from my old work and we were like getting it on and watching lesbian porn it was wired because I couldn’t stand this girl from work and havent thought about her ever lol xxx and then I had a dream that I found out I was pregnant and then got on the bus to town to buy some fags and then the next minute I was having a abourtion and then I got proposed to at a bus stop with a ring that was stolen hahaha.
I was thinking why do we have dreams and do they always have meanings or is it are minds just thinking about random things and putting them all together and playing them out for you like a movie.
If they really meant somthing like showing you things that would one say happen then the world would be one really sick place because are minds can think of some really bad things happening.
Also yesterday I was think about what someone had said about me and Toni. They said the new me and Ian wouldn’t last very long and that they can tell he is only a rebound boyfriend because we don’t have the spark me and Toni had.
They said when they saw me and Toni you could tell how much we loved each other and that we really would do anything for each other.
And that got me thinking what if there’s only one person in the world that is ment for you and that’s when you get spark. What I mean is everytime you kiss that person you get fire works in your head and butterfly’s in your tummy.
I know I’m a old romantic and that you can be with anyone you want to if you just work at it but what if me and Toni really were sole mates and were meant to be together and I have lost the chance of being happy. All because I was being stubborn over a few little things.
I hope I’m wrong and that everyone has more than just one person out there for them as I know that I have blown it with Toni and I really would like to stay with Ian for as long as we’re both still happy but I will just have to wait and see.