I always though if I lost Toni it would feel like the end of the world for me. But it’s starting to get easier everyday.
Sometimes it’s hard as you miss having the company but know I’m just think I don’t need him anymore.
I don’t even feel like I ever moved in with him them seven months are just a blank for me now.
I couldn’t of been that happy as I would have a lot of good memories to show for it.
But I don’t I have some really unhappy memories and I wondered why i didn’t move out sooner. Then I realised it’s because I didn’t won’t to be living at home anymore. I liked telling people that I had my own house.
For me it was always what people thought of me that controlled me. Nobody can say they don’t care what people think of them because everybody does its a human feeling and you can’t change that about your self.
I feel like every time I look at his house I just think in happy I’m not with him anymore but could I not have kept the house maybe then I would have been even happier than I am now.
All I would have done was party ad that my personality and that’s one of the things I miss it’s my house party’s.
I’m not one of these people that can just stay at home and watch tv all day I have to be up and about doing something.